24 September 2007

Discussion; Poor or Rich?

I'd like to start a discussion topic; would appreciate everyone pitching in a little, giving some feedback, comments, and discussing the issue. It's pretty open ended so feel free to say whatever you like.

Discussion 1:

Which would you rather be? Poor, financially unstable, yet surrounded by friends, family, and love?

Or would you rather be Rich, unbelievably to the point where you can get anything you want at the tip of your fingers. Yet you have no real friends, no close ties with family, and so on.

I want to know everyones point of view, and why you think that way. Can the money make up for the other things? What makes a happy life?


Some excellent discussion and viewpoints raised, thanks everyone for participating. Click on 'comments' below to read how it went.


Anonymous said...

Honored to be the first to comment:)
I'd go with poor, yet surrounded by family, friends and love...without thinking much I should add.
Why? I'm not poor, but I wouldn't say I'm rich either (which I think is the best situation to be in, by the way). There was a time when I thought I needed no one for help, for I'm used to solving problems on my own, but there came a day when I realized that one simply cannot do it alone in life, no matter how strong you think you are.
Without going through details, I've been through difficult times, and it had nothing to do with money. I don't think I would've been able to get through them without the help of my family.
Also, my friends have faced difficult times as well, and had it not been for us standing together through them, they also might not have gotten through.
In my opinion, family, friends, and love is like having everything you could ever have in life! without them, you simply cannot live, or to be more percise, you cannot GO ON in life. Eventually, one realizes they cannot make it with money only. It's just a mean, through which you can accommodate the basic things you need for living.

Missy said...

hmm i'd go for surrounded by friends, family, and love.

but not poor!
nor a richy-rich!

like how poor do u mean? poor to the extent that I don't have money to buy clothes or food or go to uni or have a car?

and how rich? to the extent that I have everything and be an ass to all the people in the world?

I'd rather stay in the middle.

Anonymous said...

I would say Rich.

Why?! not for selfish reasons...

i'll just use the money for good things and make everthing right
relationship wise.

you see fii 7al 7ag both your points ;p it can be one or the other .

Dr. Shale bin Agnon said...

If you are really poor then you do not deserve a family. Why would you want a family that could not afford to eat and clothe themselves to exist? How cruel would you be to bring children into poverty?

Better never to have been than to have been poor and without hope.

Shionge said...

Yo how interesting ...I have watched The Rich & The Famous...they are far too rich to appreciate little things in life.

When I was young I saw the struggle my parents been through been poor - making ends meet and squeezing out money to give us as an allowance so I have been through hardship myself.

Now that I have a stable income with savings for rainings days, I appreciate the little things in life :D

So to me, financial independence with enough is joyful enough!

Anonymous said...

for me it is not the money end of the question which predetermines the answer but the family bit-I will definitely choose family and friends, no matter what the material conditions are and even if they are very bad. in a way, I simply cannot imagine that in a loving family the material poverty is long sustained because through that love comes committment to helping one another, so I doubt you can ever be really poor, unless of course everyone is unlucky and doing equally miserably in terms of their employment.. in any case, material povery is million times better than the poverty of the soul, which is the contradition of a family life. once you realize that it is not money in life that makes you rich as a person, you will never feel poor again.

Lamya said...

It seems like some people here are going for balance,which i agree with.I have not been poor,but i work in communities where there is extreme poverty.In those communities,one is reminded of the goodness of human beings.There,no neighbour eats if his/her neighbour does not have.There is a sharing spirit,sort of like,'what belongs to me also belongs to all who do not have'.This is called ubuntu..And i admire this.Personally,i would prefer to be comfortable (have my house,car,food,and be able to shop,go out and entertain),but never to loose the sense of how very very fortunate I am (al7mdlilah) to be able to do all that.:)

KJ said...

The middle of the road is where the best option lies, but between the two, being rich monetarily is not a form of richness. When you die, your money won't save you - but if you are poor and have lots of friends and loved ones and family, you'd end up enjoying life with all this support, you'd be generally happy and when you die your loved ones will keep on praying for you.

Now that's rich :)

Ammaro said...

Some good points there; a few have mentioned being somewhere in the middle which is fair, this is what most of us want in life after all. But try to imagine being offered only the two extremes? Which would you choose?

Missy; When I say poor I don't mean not being to afford clothes and so on, I just mean having enough money to make it through life, but without any of the luxuries.

Shale; Not necessarily a family you create; could be you living poor but with your brothers, sisters and parents

MoonLight, BlueDress, Shionge, SoBeIt: Thanks for the comments; now each of you chose a specific way for how you want your life. If you were put in the opposite one, would you be happy? Or not?

Lamya; sure, in places where there is little money, you see more faith, more kindness, more human compassion. Unfortunately when there is more money, most of that seems to go out the door. Anybody have an idea why that is?

Ammaro said...

Makes a lot of sense KJ. Any more opinions and ideas guys?

Anonymous said...

We keep hearing and reading "money doesn't buy happeniess". Well it won't buy you sadness like poverty!
This term is coined by the rich to keep the common man from trying to get to where they are. Money DOES buy happniess.

What is better than living the lifestyle you always wanted and being able to provide to yourself and your family whatever you want whenever you feel like it. How do you want to live your life? If you enjoy hardship then by all means stick to being poor. If you enjoy pampering yourself and living life in luxury and ease with minimal to no hardships then you know which side to pick.

As with friends and family, I can always make new friends no matter where I am and I will have a mini family of my own sometime. I will also find it MUCH easier to make friends and keep close ties with family if they know I got the dough.

There is a HUGE difference between being wealthy and being rich. Being wealthy may not make me happier than being rich BUT being rich WILL make me happier than being poor. I say this with absolutely no doubt in my mind.

Anonymous said...

I think none of the above commenters know what it is to be poor . I do , When poverty strikes all your loved ones leave you , you are left in ruins while the relatives and fiends just watch you and do nothing. Money is what brings family and friends together . Trust me ! once you have money people want to be your friends ...

Say it by life's experience ,

MacaholiQ8 said...

Rich. Don't ask why.

Dr. Shale bin Agnon said...

Grey, read all the comments first!! I agree with you entirely. I would rather be rich than poor with friends and family.

Ammaro, whether the family are my children or siblings and parents makes no difference.

Being poor means being hungry, and you love nothing when you are hungry. I think your question is a bit moot, because you will not be surrounded by loving friends and family if you are very poor.

However, Lamya makes a point about ubuntu. Do you mean absolutely poor or poor relative to your surroundings?

Capt. Arab said...

I'd prefer to have a bit of everybody in moderate amounts, not too much and not too little.. Call it a balanced diet. I think stability is important, though I wouldn't mind winning the grand-prize Hassad, Hayraat or Mazyouna. Wish me luck Bro.. I've only been waiting 8 years.

Unknown said...

Interesting comments. I refuse to make a choice, and keep that to God's will. Whatever happens, I will be pleased and accept it however it is.

Anonymous said...

ok, I already chose poor with family and friends, that's if i have no other choice.
if i had a choice, it'd be the middle situation.
Why not poor? well, that's quite obvious. but why not rich? because i think the more money you have, the more responsibility you hold, if you wanna live fairly that is (as in give poor ppl a share, and not forget your family and friends who come first and so on).
Not that i'd rather run away from responsibility, but in the end it's a burnden one must carry and be aware of. but that's only my opinion.
if i had no choice but to be rich and lonely, of course i won't be happy! i know for a fact that my happiness is with my family and friends. besides, for me, being lonely is the most pittiful situation a human can ever be in! what can money do you then? nothing i think.

a very nice post and subject by the way. do more of those please:)

Anonymous said...

OF COURSE!!!!!! I wanna be that poor guy. Family is a bless!

Money can be returned when it's gone! but a friend/family member can't!

Anonymous said...

*knock knock*

Re.Loaded Soul said...

I don't want to comppliate issues here, but don't you think that most of the people don't appreciate what they are in, wither they are rich or poor.

The poor thinks, by being rich he/she would be able to do many things that currently deprived of. On the other hand, rich people might blame their wealth for anything bad happen to them, as the money being cursed or it brings sorrow sometimes.

Anyways, if I have given the choices, I will skip answering and just be as I am.

Anonymous said...

"If you were put in the opposite one, would you be happy? Or not?"



well, I don't know.. I suppose you can always make SOME use of all that money when you don't have ALL that harassing family and real friends. you can pay someone to act like your family and I'm sure some people out there somewhere would go for a ride if you told them you have all this time and all that money to waste.. but seriously, no, I don't think I could do it. I'd be miserable and hanging from the top of the Seef Tower or some tall building like that. "A suicide of a depressed millionairess" would be the precise headline that day on Gulf Daily News. good thing I'm poor! ;)

Lamya said...

Shale,i think the poverty referred to here is what would be called sort of working class elsewhere.Ammaro stated that his poor is just being able scrape by with the necessities,but not being able to afford any luxury.My definition of poor is what i see around me,abject poverty.Always hungry,desperate,sick(but cant afford transport to the hospital),always cold,would do anything for a dollar,no education,living in a shack made of newspaper and scrap,no running water or electricity poverty.If faced with that,i would definately choose rich..I dont think people in the Middle East see this kind of poverty very often:)

Lamya said...

Being rich doesnt mean that you have to show it off or talk about it.I was taught that it is very bad manners to talk about ones money.If i was that rich,I would continue to live a moderate lifestyle and use the money for the enrichment of others lives..Anonymously of course.And even in the absence of family,that would make me happy.

Anonymous said...

I would say poor! I was rich! Living in Kuwait! I had a bedroom that my house now is just double the size of it! So I lived in a big house drove cars and anytime I needed money I had it! For me that was a prison! A prison made of gold, but still a prison!

I’m poor now, have a great husband and a nice daughter! We barely pay our bills! I drive a car that is so old! If remember right 1993! Now I am a lot happier and calmer, and free! I’m getting a small loan to buy a motorbike and maybe get some things fixed in my body! Yes I am poor but I feel richer than I was 10-15years ago!

Ammaro said...

yousif; i actually think it was coined by the poor man to make him feel happier.

grey; yep, when you have money everyone wants to be around you, lol. why is that? does it just feel good to be around someone whose rich? or are they trying to leech some money off of you?

criticizer; ok, i wont :)

Shale; thats an interesting point (ie, relative to your surroundings). Research has been done and proved to show that people who live in neighbourhoods and mingle with people who are of a similar or lower standard feel much happier than those who live between richer people. Its all about how rich you relatively feel. You could be driving a 1980 chevy but if everyone around you had to take the bus, you're the "dude who's rich enough to own a car".

Capt Arab; youre not the only one waiting!

n: you refuse? :)

moonlight; When you have nothing, you have no stress, you have no responsibilities, you have nothing to lose. When you have lots and lots of money, are you always worried about your assets? too much all over the place?

rekoo; makes sense...

Anonymous said...

As B.I.G. said, mo money mo problems!

Ammaro said...

cece; ooh look, still alive!

reloaded; i've noticed that its a general human trait never to be happy with what you have, and always want what you dont. Sure, theres the odd exception, but overall thats how it is..

so be it; well, before you jump, please give me the rest of your money...

lamya; i dont think anyone would want to be in poverty, since unfortunately it makes for a miserable living. If faced with situations where you cant eat, provide reasonable shelter for yourself, or have the ability to cure yourself from ailments and diseases, then I think almost everyone would easily choose any other available option. Here I meant not having the luxuries of life, but yes, I know what you mean. However, refering to your last line, yes, a lot of people in the mid-east are spoiled, ill give you that. About not showing off, thats great, I wish more people were like you.

nora; something about not having an abundance of money can mean living a fuller life. im glad youre happy :)

anon; haha, yeah. I was actually listening to that last week.

Unknown said...

Yeah in all honesty. I would refuse to make that choice. I think they call that in poker, double or nothing. lol. What I mean is, I don't believe in being forced into choosing. Under duress I would protect my family first, then my money, with my life. Yeah, totally different than where the original comments are going, lol.

Mrs Dynamite aka Lorena +Wonder Women... said...

Okay .. being rich means you dont have close friends? and no familie?... I dont thinks so .. you can be rich and have friends and family :.. Im not rich by the way ..no eathe poor Elhamdullillha mashaallah , but my grand ma always told us some thing ... You girls marry a rich guy .. we always say NO NO , and she always told us something.. Marriege is same being rich or being poor , but being rich you have no needs... your kids have no needs, and being poor .. you have fights coz you have needs, you kids , and your house .. wish is true ...

Anonymous said...

Yes, i think some ppl might do that (worry about their assets if they have so much money) but that's not what i mean actually, what i mean is, when you're rich and you wanna do it right (live good even with lots of money), you'll have to think about others before yourself. give everyone in need within the family, you can't also forget your relatives, then there are those in your sociaty who are in need. and when ppl know you have lots of money, they'll sure expect you to lend some help for those who need it. actually, if u think about it properly, it's their right (the needy) that you give them money. you also would feel responsible if you care about others.
bottom line, it's not right to have very rich ppl in a sociaty where there are poor ppl. there should be some kind of balance. that's why i think i'd feel stressed and responsible for all the money i got. not to mention forgetting about myself completely! as i so often do!

Reem B. said...

Seriously???? I'd be poooor yet with friends around me... people whom I'd laugh with... people whom I'd turn to when in neeed of a sholder to cry on...

Money is amazing of course... it does not buy happiness... it can buy things that can make you happy.. but what goood is that when you have nobody? Humans are not creatures that can survive isolation.

People with money are surrounded by people who love their credit cards and bank accounts more than they love them. What good is that?
I mean, here in our societies we see such things a lot... it sucks.

If being poor would give me amazing friends and peace then I'd be poor..

But then, if I'm poor, Would I have peace of mind? I'd be thinking of all the loans, of tomorrow's obligations, of what I can't get...

Never ending discussion I guess...

Un poco de todo would be great as they say ;)

Reem B. said...

( a bit of everything) that is.

Woozie said...

Poor. We've been living that for the longest time, and it really isn't as bad as someone might think it is.