This is a call out from me and all the other men in the world to you women. We love you, but there are some rules we need to lay down!
--------------------------
- Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way!--------------------------
- Crying is blackmail. Don't do it.--------------------------
- Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
- Subtle hints do not work!
- Strong hints do not work!
- Obvious hints do not work!
- JUST SAY IT!--------------------------
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.--------------------------
- If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.--------------------------
- If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.--------------------------
- You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
- Not both.
- If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.--------------------------
- Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.--------------------------
- Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.--------------------------
- ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
- Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
- We have no idea what mauve is.--------------------------
- If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.--------------------------
- If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.--------------------------
- If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.--------------------------
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.--------------------------
- You have enough clothes.--------------------------
- You have too many shoes.--------------------------
- I am in shape. Round is a shape.--------------------------
Thank you for reading. I realize that I might lose most, if not all of my female readers after this post. Humph...
26 comments:
Funny.. But you are sad !!!!
What!? You're saying you DONT AGREE??? DONT LIE!
BTW; All comments need to be taken with a sense of humor... Otherwise my wife won't let me sleep inside the house tonight :p
Hilarious and SO TRUE!
Christopher Columbus thought he was in India!
Technicality!
lol, everytime I read this I get a good laugh out of it. Sigh, if only some women would consider..
loooool!
hint ; dear, you need help
strong hint ; get help
some thing to do ; visit a shrink now!
:)
you just say that cuz ur a women!
dont generalize gents... i'm female yet:
- i hate shopping
- i love sports
- i would NEVER ask a guy if he thinks i'm fat or if what i'm wearing looks good!
the rest is just funny! :)
n; yes, unfortunately for us, they dont!
bah diva; eeeeem, the advice is pretty serious, maybe you should take it to mind :p
homer; yes, women, hmph...
msb; youre like, the exception to the rule.
- If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
INDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED
looool :D
you, bad boy you ..
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! @ "Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials."
wallah this is the most funniest post i have evr read! :D
good work Ammaro ;)
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL big time on the last point.
"I am in shape, round is a shape" =P!!
I must be FAIR most of the points are so true! =P but again us women will always remain women! and you must admit MEN cannot live with out us =P nor can we live with them =D
Nice post! =D
- If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
--------------------------
- If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
and i thought that im treating her badly!
ammaro, how is the back seat of you car?
thats where ur sleeping tonight, hahah.
hmmm, I didnt say anything :P
Dykes own.
LOOOOOOOOOOOOL Ammaroooooo!! LOOOOOOL Wallah I will Post some thing to help women from the man! LOL just wait!
Wink!
i thot pumpkin was a veggie?
okaaaay, ur being a tiny, wingy, little bit harsh here...but then, men are harsh sometimes!
I'm sure u'll be sleeping home tonight, which shows u something men tend to forget about women most of the time;)
Cool post:) although I sometimes wonder why don't women lay rules like men do!
Man for sure you just gained a female reader! :D Love the way you laid things down! You made me smile…
I agree with everything you said but I think my husband still has to suffer with me asking him if I’m fat! :P As I have to suffer he telling about the new football player the team got for 10th time (and still listen with a smile)! :P
Hahah! how about some women rules?? :P
ill make sure to do that
oh, man this is great.
ROFLMAO ! man if i follow your rules you gonna get me kicked out of the house !
haha guys (and girls) thanks for the replies, really :) All great, needless to say I had to sleep on the sofa last night :p
jk, hope you all enjoyed them :)
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